40 Days of Believing God – Day 10

I’ve shared the following story before, but I know it will be new to many of you. It has to do with the night God revealed His feelings to me.

October 3, 2002, was the day before my 40th birthday, so I did something I’d never done before…I asked God for a birthday present. I realize that sounds a little strange, but that’s what I did. I also got the sense that God was saying, “yes.”

Since my birthday was the next day, I naturally assumed my present would come that day. It didn’t. Of course, I didn’t really know what I was looking or waiting for. All I’d asked for was a present. I hadn’t specified a particular item, color or size.

So I began to do what I usually do when I can’t see God working–I began to doubt. Maybe I hadn’t really sensed God saying “yes.” Maybe I’d made it up.

About ten days later, I was in New Jersey for a couple of nights visiting my dad and step-mom. My dad had paid for my flight so I could visit and we could go to a football game together. One night while in bed, I was debating with myself and with God about my “present.” I was trying to believe God was going to come through, but I was doubting more than believing.

I fell asleep around 11:00 p.m., but woke up about an hour later from a terrible dream. In my dream, I’d been accused of murdering two people. All the circumstantial evidence pointed to my guilt even though I was innocent.

My first thought after coming out of the dream was, “Lord, what was that all about? It’s a terrible feeling to not be believed.”

What happened next is still the most intimate moment I’ve ever experienced with God. I did not hear a voice, but just as clearly as if had, I sensed God say, “That’s how I feel when You don’t believe Me.”

By the end of that month, God hadn’t come through with one present. He had showered me with many presents. Here they are:

• My dad paid for my trip to New Jersey to spend a weekend with him.
• I got to see a NASCAR race at Talladega, including a pass to the driver’s meeting and chapel service. All expenses paid.
• I got to go on a three-day pheasant hunting trip to South Dakota. All expenses paid.
• I got a 21% raise at work.
• Friends of ours gave us $2,000.

The circumstantial evidence in your life may lead you to believe God is not good and can’t be believed. Don’t “convict” God based on the circumstantial evidence though. You can believe Him. Trust His character. He’s His own character witness and can always be believed.

“And without faith it is impossible to please God, because anyone who comes to him must believe that he exists and that he rewards those who earnestly seek him.”  –Hebrews 11:6

Jesus was in the stern, sleeping on a cushion. The disciples woke him and said to him, “Teacher, don’t you care if we drown?”

He got up, rebuked the wind and said to the waves, “Quiet! Be still!” Then the wind died down and it was completely calm.

He said to his disciples, “Why are you so afraid? Do you still have no faith?” –Mark 4:38-40

“And he was amazed at their lack of faith.”  –Mark 6:6

While Jesus was still speaking, some men came from the house of Jairus, the synagogue ruler. “Your daughter is dead,” they said. “Why bother the teacher any more?”

Ignoring what they said, Jesus told the synagogue ruler, “Don’t be afraid; just believe.” –Mark 5:35-37